Лесная Братва – Кулинарный Velo Non-Stop – Алиби для жены или где ты шлялся прошлой ночью +25°C

Лесная Братва – Кулинарный Velo Non-Stop – Алиби для жены или где ты шлялся прошлой ночью +25°C

We ride bicycles at low speed from the city into nature and into the forest. I have shortness of breath (it’s hard to breathe) because it’s hot outside and I have a huge 45-liter backpack on my back. The weight of the backpack is more than 15 kg.

At the very beginning of our journey, I want to say words of gratitude to all the cyclists who knew about today’s trip, but did not go with us. Thank you very much! We will get more food :).

The mountain bikers decided to ride ahead so that it would be easier for us to follow them. Now we will ride bicycles to a location where the road is made of sand and stones. On this road on slick tires, I will get tired and curse from the poor quality of the road.

Hedgehog rides ahead on a Specialized Demo 8 (2012) mountain bike. Then Lisa rides a GT Avalanche 2.0 (2008) mountain bike. Telephone! Telephone! Lisa’s phone fell from its mount (on the steering wheel) to the ground. And ahead of everyone is the Cat on a gravel bike BXT Gravel 135 Carbon 700C Chameleon (2023).

Such a cool wind. Great! A little wind is good. Because there will be a fire at the destination. I will be able to wear a special suit that protects my body from forest ticks (the bite of such ticks is deadly, you can die) and from mosquitoes.

And I will give my friends my spray called OFF, which protects against mosquitoes for 4 hours from the moment the spray is applied to the body and clothes. Because friends have nothing with them. Only I have everything with me.

For this you always need me. Because I always have everything I need with me. The bike and body shake a lot on this road. A mountain bike with a suspension fork and rear shock absorber is very comfortable to ride on this road.

And it’s uncomfortable to ride a gravel bike on this road. Even on a gravel bike with a Cro-Mo frame. The Forest Brothers rode ahead of me on their bicycles. Only Rocket rides a bicycle behind everyone else.

When we reach our destination, we will show who has what kind of backpacks on their backs and how much each of us’s backpack weighs. The road is very bad! Stones! Hedgehog loaned his Specialized Demo 8 mountain bike to me. This bike is very comfortable to ride on rocks.

I just ride the Specialized Demo 8 over bumps and rocks and feel comfortable. I don’t mind the rocks as there are 6 chainstays and good shock absorbers that make this bike the most comfortable to ride. You can ride this bike 40 km/h.

You won’t be able to ride a mountain bike (hardtail) or gravel bike at 40 km/h here. And the Specialized Demo 8 bike can go very fast over rocks. Rocket: Are you comfortable riding my Author Ronin bike? Hedgehog: Yes, great! Only on this road on a gravel bike I hurt all my kidneys :).

Rocket: I won’t swap bikes with you back :). I’ll ride home on your Specialized Demo 8 mountain bike 🙂 (because it’s comfortable). Mountain biking is Power! Gravel bike is the Grave! Rocket: You all can’t drive on sand on narrow slick tires? 🙂

Cat: I have Panaracer Gravelking SS 700x38C tires :). It’s difficult for me to drive on sand. Rocket: My Specialized Demo 8 has a tire width of 2.3-2.5″ :). Cat: I have new semi-slick tires, which are not suitable for driving on sand, because there is no tread on the tires :).

Rocket: You installed it on yours BXT Gravel bike new semi-slick tires that don’t ride on sand :). Cat: Panaracer Gravelking. Rocket: Ha-Ha :). Cat: Panaracer Gravelking tires are very good tires!

Rocket: They are good! I ride on my gravel bike Panaracer Gravelking SK tires are more than 3 years old and the tires are in excellent condition. These tires have a very long service life and do not wear out the tread quickly.

If you do not do sharp braking on asphalt, then the service life of Panaracer Gravelking tires is more than 5 years. I ride a gravel bike from from Specialized with straight handlebars :).

The freewheeling is very good.All the bumps on the road are not felt, since the bike has a rear shock absorber and a front suspension fork.Who wants the perfect gravel bike? Here he is :). Friends on gravel bikes fell behind. We often ride bicycles into nature with adventures (difficulties, problems along the way).

Rocket: I have a tool that can be used to push the pads apart. But you need to disassemble the caliper. You need to remove the wheel. Or you can remove the caliper to spread the pads. Remove the brake caliper from the bike. Rocket asks the Hedgehog: Do you have hex keys?

The hedgehog asks the Fox: Do you have hex keys? Cat: How many animals does it take to repair a bicycle? 🙂 Rocket: How many animals does it take to remove the rear brake caliper and spread the brake pads? :))) Rocket: Fox! (calling Lisa) Lisa: What? I’m doing bad things here :).

Rocket: Repairing a Specialized Demo 8 gravel bike :). Rocket: I don’t understand. Are your tires already wearing out their tread? It’s time to change your tires to new ones. Cat: You haven’t seen the hernia on this tire yet (hole in the tire). Rocket: Where? Hedgehog: I already sewed up the tire.

Rocket: Heavy bag? Lisa: Fine! Weighs as much as my entire backpack :). There is food in this bag. I’m already hungry. I didn’t eat anything in the evening on purpose, so that more food would fit into me when we cooked food over the fire. My bag is a food cooler.

Glass bottles rattle in my backpack. These glass bottles contain the Russian carbonated drink Tarragon (tastier than American Coca Cola). Whoever comes to us with a sword will leave us with a sawed-off limb :). An abandoned children’s bike. We continue on our way. This is our Cross Country competition bike course.

Shall we do a Cross Country race? Now the bike computer shows 313 km and 600 meters. Let’s see what distance will be on the cycling computer at the end of our journey. They are overtaking me. We have started cross-country cycling competitions here. I stopped a little on the way up.

And the Cat and the Fox got off their bicycles and ran up the mountainside with their feet. And I want to ride my gravel bike up the side of a mountain. The cat and the fox used a cheat code to climb up the mountainside – running with their feet :).

You need to turn on the second light (to see the road better). Here! This way you can see the road much better. Lisa: I won’t go too fast on my bike. Cat: Ha-Ha Let’s continue on our way. There’s just a little more to go.

The Specialized Demo 8 gravel bike accelerates away from me. We need to increase the speed. Wow! I almost drove into the grass (because I drive on slick tires on sand). Climbing up the hillside. I drive up a hill at high speed. Difficult! And again down the hill.

This is how fun we are going to the place where our Culinary Velo Non-Stop will be. On the left is a lake with fish in it. The cows are standing. Horrible smell from cow shit. We don’t like dogs!

We are leaving from the dog that is guarding the cows and wants to bite us. An angry dog ​​is running after us. I deceived my friends a little. It’s not 1 km. A little more kilometers :).

But it’s okay. We had a great ride along the foot of the mountains. We felt the stinking smell of cow shit :). We still have a little more to go. Rocket: I don’t like this bike ride anymore :). It’s hard to go this route. Who came up with this trip? 🙂

Fox: Let’s go to nature to have a tasty meal (we’re going far and we need to go even further). Rocket spoke. It will be fun (everyone is not having fun now) said Rocket :). Rocket: For now we have a cross-country race on bicycles 🙂 (cross-country)

Rocket: That’s it! This is the last small climb up the hill. Then a short descent down the mountain. Then we need to climb up the hill to a height of 200 meters. And we will eat. We ride bicycles well. In 5 hours everyone has to go to work.

Since I ride on slick tires, my bike bounces from side to side in the sand. We drove a section of the Cross Country route along the foot of the mountain. What remained was a difficult climb up the hillside. I hate this climb up the hill.

All! There’s only a little bit left to go. Rocket: Enjoy nature and the sound of mosquitoes. Lisa: Shut up! Climbing up the mountainside. This is the worst thing in the world of gravel and mountain bikes. I’m already tired.

I would like to ask a question: Why did we ride bicycles here? 🙂 It’s so hard. It’s terribly hard! We’re still going up the hill. This is a killer mountain! The climb up the hillside is complete. Now we are riding bicycles in a dark forest.

After the dark forest there will be another climb up the hillside. And after getting up there will be a location where we will stop and eat. The kind of nature where we will eat is already appearing. Some day :).

We have one last long climb up the hillside. And then there will be the end point of our cycling route. There’s still a little more cycling left to do. I hope that the most beautiful place is not occupied by car drivers. Hedgehog: Even Rocket is not tired. Rocket: Stop resting! Let’s move on.

Cat: Blat! 🙂 That place is occupied by people. So we’re stopping here. Cat: What’s wrong with these mosquitoes? Rocket: Mosquitoes are bad! Rocket: Dragonflies are good! Because dragonflies eat mosquitoes. There’s coal here. Here it is. There’s food here. And I went to look for firewood.

Me and the Cat with this saw are going in search of firewood. The main thing is to light the fire for the first time so that the wood burns quickly, and add coal on top and that’s it. Bonfire. I’m sawing wood. And you carry firewood. So. Once. Two. Three.

All. No more firewood needed. A little more water (I wash my hands with soap before working with meat). Beauty! Now we will fry the meat. I have a Yakut knife. But I haven’t sharpened it yet.

I bought it in the year of the pandemic. I have long wanted a Yakut knife. That’s why I bought this knife. Hedgehog: Do you know how to sharpen a Yakut knife correctly? No, I don’t know how to sharpen knives myself.

This knife needed sharpening. But in the year of the pandemic, all public places, all shops and all workshops were closed. Therefore, I could not give the knife to a master who can sharpen this knife correctly. But the Yakut knife is very sharp and cuts meat very easily and accurately.

Hedgehog: Yakut knives are sharpened only on one side. Rocket: Yes. Yes. I know that. This is a cash receipt for meat. Meat costs 1388 rubles. This meat is called spiced pork neck medallions. And I also bought ribs with spicy seasoning. These are the ribs. The smell is wonderful.

Do you think there won’t be enough coal? We can add more coal. Lisa: No! Everything is fine. There are enough coals. There is heat from the coals. Smells delicious. Lisa: Of course it smells delicious. First batch of roasted ribs. It smells very tasty.

The first batch of meat was fried. Immediately add coal to the grill for the second batch of meat. Only 3 batches of meat. Lisa: That’s why we rode our bikes so far. In order to eat delicious meat in nature with a beautiful sunrise. Other meat.

This is how we spend our time on the culinary Velo Non-Stop. The ribs we fried from the heat of the coals. Eat ribs! Velo Non-Stop is coming to an end. We ate meat. We talked. We rested. I don’t have to go to work today because today is my day off.

And the Cat, the Hedgehog and the Fox will go to work today. And it will be very difficult for them (since they didn’t sleep all night). Ahead of us is the second section of the cross-country bike route.

There is a small straight section here (no more climbing up the hillside). And then a cool ride down the hill. But due to the fact that we have slick and semi-slick tires, the descent down the hill will be difficult. Let’s see what we can do. All. Let’s go! This is Cross Country!

On this hill descent, those cyclists who know how to control a bike in Downhill mode always go much further than those cyclists who don’t know how to control a bike. Cat: Catch up with us. Whoops! 🙂 Gravel bikes are a force. Mountain bikes are a grave.

Lisa: Yes! I feel like I’m going to die soon 🙂 (that is, it’s hard to ride and you can easily fall). We all drive on slick tires. We’re crazy! We are crazy riders! Now carefully! There will be a right turn. And then there will be a descent down the hill.

You’ll love it. I promise :). Carefully! Lots of bumps. Birch broken on the way. We continue driving without brakes. Now there will be a right turn. Don’t take too many risks! There are a lot of tree roots here. Cool ride down the hill! This is real cross country!

Cat: I’ve ridden a bike here, but only a mountain bike. Roots! Tree roots are evil!

I understood why everything was so bad. It’s all the fault of the ATV drivers who ride here and dig up sand and soil with their tires, so there are a lot of roots left on the surface of the earth. Carefully! Now there will be a difficult descent from the sand.

It will be the hardest for me and Cat to ride our bikes down the hill, since we have the narrowest slick tires. Be careful here! Brake! It’s a dangerous ride down the hill! Cat: Minus one :). A fall! Fox, be careful on the descent! The sand was dug up by ATV drivers. Carefully!

We ride gravel bikes on slick tires on a cross-country course. A lot of tree roots. And we have slick tires. Branches fly off the bicycle wheels. The bush branches almost got into my eyes. Skids on the sand. Carefully! There’s a moat here! Forest ditch from forest fires. Brake!

There is another forest fire ditch ahead. Carefully! There will be a second ditch here. This is where the moat will be. Carefully! A children’s bicycle from a horror movie. Only there was sand there. This is a normal road. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! What it is? Horror! Thanks for the trip!

Cat: Thanks for the trip! If I survive, I will write :). Our first culinary Velo Non-Stop is over. Everyone went home. Lisa is driving ahead of me (going home). The fox got 3 pieces of meat today, which we fried over the fire. And the Fox is bringing this meat for his beloved wife.

Our company (our cycling club) is going home. Everyone has to go to work in the morning. It’s 04:20 am. We left the city on bicycles at 22:00 and rode for 6 hours and 30 minutes. We rode bicycles and ate. We rode our bikes the entire Cross Country route.

We have now arrived in the city. I am very tired. The bike chain is very dry (we rode on sand). It’s time to replace it with a new one. On my back is a large backpack that is higher than my head.

Therefore, the backpack acts like the sail of a yacht, that is, it interferes with riding a bicycle. Now I’ll go to the town square and buy ice cream. I’ll just eat ice cream. And then I’ll ride my bike home.

The weather is good now. The wind blows, which drives the mosquitoes away from me. I decided to have some food and drink carbonated Tarragon juice on the river bank. I bought 2 different sweet cheeses. Miracle and Seryshevsky. Now I’ll find out which one tastes better.

Almost the same taste. But this one tastes better. Curd cheese glazed with cocoa. Seryshevsky. Ice cream tube with cream. Chocolate. Manufacturer: SibHolod (Siberia). Cow on the label. Now I’ll find out whether it’s tasty or not. You can eat!

ANIMAL GANG / ЛЕСНАЯ БРАТВА:
🐈 CAT: BXT Gravel 135 Carbon 700C Chameleon (2023)
🦊FOX: GT Avalanche 2.0 (2008) @GTBicycles1
🦔 SONIC: Specialized Demo 8 (2012) @specializedbicycles
🦩 PINK FLAMINGO: Author Ronin (2021) @authoradmin

– – – VIDEO – – –
CAMERA 1: Sony FDR-X3000 [2021]
CAMERA 2: Sony Xperia 5 II [2021]
CHEST MOUNT HARNESS: Sony AKA-CMH1 [2021]

– – – CLOTHING – – –
HELMET: MET Veleno Black M (56-58 см) [2023]
GLOVES: GSG Lycra Gloves Black M [2021]
JERSEY: Wydaho Downhill M [2021]
SHORTS: Volcom Fiji Pro Boardshort Scrubs Black 21″ W30 [2019]
SNEAKERS: DC Shoes Zebra 10.5D [2018]

– – – ACCESSORIES – – –
CYCLE COMPETER: Cat Eye Velo 9 Black CC-VL 820 – 29.3g [2022]
MUDGUARD FRONT: SKS Edge AL Black 700x46mm Lenght 720мм [2023]
MUDGUARD REAR: SKS Edge AL Black 700x46mm Lenght 1200мм [2023]
BOTTLE CAGE FRAME 1: Topeak iGlow Cage B 2хCR2032 [2023]
BOTTLE CAGE FRAME 2: Topeak iGlow Cage B 2хCR2032 [2023]
LIGHT BAR END: Cat Eye ORB Bar End Bike Light Set Black – 25g x2=50g [2021]

– – – TOOLS 1 (Saddle Bags) – – –
METALL BOX: IceToolz Tire Puncture Repair Kit 55g
TYRES LEVERS: Maxxis Premium Tire Lever 2 pcs 36g [2014]
PRESTA/SCHRADER ADAPTER: Brass 4g
CHAIN LINK 9s: KMC CL566R 3g
CHAIN LINK 10s: KMC-0L CL559R 2g
CHAIN TOOL: Park Tool CT-6.3 5-12spd 123g [2022]

– – – TOOLS 2 (Backpack) – – –
PENCIL CASE: DC TANK SS14 Wheelie Print TU 47g [2016]
PLIERS: GROSS 180мм 250g
CHAIN TOOL: BBB BTL-77 LinkFix Chain Tool 151g [2019]
ROTOR TOOL: Super B TB-8010 Rotor Truing Fork Bicycle Tool 187g
TUBE REPAIR KIT: BBB LeakFix Self-Adhesive Inner Tube Patches BTL-80 [2022]
MAGNETIC BIT DRIVER: SATA 61002 6.3x100mm 124g + Bits 95g
SHORT ARM HEX KEY: Jonnesway H01SM109S CrV 1.5-8.0 mm 129g
Ключ для педалей с накидной головкой 8 и Торкс25 для роторов 103g
WRENCH COMBINATION: SATA 40205 10mm 50g
WRENCH COMBINATION: SATA 40203 8mm 30g
TOW ROPE: Paracord КМФ78 Pink Fluorescent 5.0 meters 39g
CABLE TIES: White 5pcs 3.5х200мм, Black 13 pcs 2.0х200мм, Black 12 pcs 3.0х200мм – 22g
BACKPACK: Deuter Trans Alpine 30L, 1250g, Deuter-Ripstop 210/Macro Lite 210 [2019]

– – – BIKE – – –
FRAME: Author Ronin Triple Butted Cromoly (52) [2021]
FORK: Author Rigid Cro-Mo 700C [2021]
STEM: Author Black 31.8х90mm [2021]
SPACERS: Author Black 6pcs x 5mm [2021]
HANDLEBAR: Promax 420 / 440 / 460 mm [2021]
HANDLEBAR TAPE: BLB Supreme Pro Reflective Pink Blue White [2023]
HEADSET: Prestine 1-1/8″ [2021]
TOP CAP: Inline Bicycle Components with laser engraving Pinkbike Russia Black/White [2022] (Made in Russia)
TRIGGER: Shimano GRX 400 (20 spd) [2021]
BRAKES LEVEL: Shimano GRX 400 [2021]
SADDLE: Author Guru X 1 Gravel Serie 270x150mm 282g [2021]
SEATPOST: Author Black 27.2mm [2021]
SEAT CLAMP: Author Black 29.8mm [2021]
B/B: Shimano BB-RS500 BC1.37×24 Road 68 mm [2021]
SPEED: 20
CHAINRINGS: Shimano GRX 600 46-30 teeth 175 mm cranks [2021]
CRANKS: Shimano GRX 600 175 mm [2021]
PEDALS: HT ANS01 Black 94x95x16mm 372g [2021]
CHAIN: KMC X10 Silver [2023]
CHAIN LUBE: Squirt Low-Temp
DERAILLEUR FRONT: Shimano GRX 400 10 speed [2021]
DERAILLEUR REAR: Shimano GRX 400 2 speed [2021]
DERAILLEUR HANGER: Author Ronin Steel Black Stock 32g [2021]
RIMS: Jalco CR25D 622x21C 32 holes [2021]
HUB FRONT: Author Radon Disc 9x100mm 32 holes [2021]
HUB REAR: Author Radon Disc 9x135mm 32 holes [2021]
SPOKES: Black Stainless Steel 1.8 mm [2021]
NIPPELS: Stock [2021]
BRAKES: Shimano GRX 400 Disc Hydraulic [2021]
BRAKES DISC PADS: Shimano K03S Resin 8g L-26.5mm, W-16.5mm, H-29.9mm [2021]
BRAKE ROTOR FRONT: Shimano SM-RT66-S 160mm Mln. TH=1.5 [2021]
BRAKE ROTOR REAR: Shimano SM-RT66-S 160mm Mln. TH=1.5 [2021]
CASSETTE: Shimano HG500-10 11-34 (10 spd) [2021]
TIRE FRONT: Specialized Infinity Sport Reflect 700x38C 780g 5.0 Bar [2023]
TIRE REAR: Specialized Infinity Sport Reflect 700x38C 780g 5.0 Bar [2023]
TUBES: Schwalbe 700×28/47-622/635 Presta 40mm 153g [2021]
VALVE CAPS: Shimano [2021]
WHEEL FRONT: 1.125-1.140 kg
WHEEL REAR: 1.775-1.790 kg (with Cassette)
WEIGHT: 12.3 kg

– – – TIMESTAMPS – – –
00:00 Начало / Beginning
00:48 Падение Андроида / Android Falling
00:56 Гравийка / Gravel Road
02:49 Поломка / Crash
03:51 Готовность к гонке / Ready to race
04:07 Кросс-кантри (вдоль холмов) / XC (along the hills)
06:56 Кросс-кантри (подъём 1) / XC (Uphill 1)
07:27 Кросс-кантри (лес) / XC (Forest)
07:54 Кросс-Кантри (подъём 2) / XC (Uphill 2)
08:27 Пункт назначения / Final Destination
08:46 Шашлык / Meat on the fire
12:33 Путь домой / Way Back Home
13:13 Кросс-кантри (Скоростной спуск) / XC (Downhill)
15:08 Падение / Crash
15:22 Кросс-кантри (Скоростной спуск) / XC (Downhill)
17:06 Велосипед из ужасов / Horror Movie Bike
17:10 Путь домой / Way Back Home
17:27 Восход солнца / Sunrise
18:13 Город / Yakutsk City
19:41 Река / River
20:27 Метеор / Meteor